You turn your back for ONE second....

I am a huge CSI fan, so I've seen more than one fake case of a missing child where the mother always says "I just turned my back for one minute and he/she was gone." Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine I'd be saying almost the exact same thing about an amphibian.

A little background: I have two turtles. Red-ear sliders to be exact. Those are the tiny turtles you see being sold on the street. Believe me, they do not stay that small. Anyway, they reside in a pretty big tank. I try and clean it as often as I can (or when people look through the grime and say "where the hell are your turtles?"). Even with help it's about an hour job.

This evening, I was cleaning out the tank alone so it was taking longer than usual. I take advantage of cleaning the tank on a feeding day, so as to distract the little monsters from what I'm doing. Needless, to say they were getting restless as I paced back and forth with buckets of water. Now, I put the smaller of the two in a deeper bucket because she's a little "special." I know I accidentally dropped one of them when they were young. It was probably her. I noticed the larger one peeking her head over the top of the small tub I feed them in. I didn't think twice about it because they always try to pull themselves out and have never succeeded before. The operative word being: before.

I pour the bucketful of clean water I drudged from the bathroom into their tank and as I'm going back one more time I turn toward the tub and see.....nothing. Right beside the tub are two little trails of water. I completely panicked. A) Because I had no idea where she was and the thought of her being loose in the apartment is frankly frightening and B) I was afraid she might pop out from some hidden corner and scare the living crap out of me. As I'm peering underneath my bed, frantically searching for any signs of movement I hear scratching coming from the other side of the bed. I run over and there she is making her way toward my bookcase. She spots me and realizing the jig is up makes a break for it. I'm serious. I know turtles are supposed to be slow but those little turtle legs can fly when determination kicks in. I manage to grab her, as she flails in protest, and place her back in her tank....hissing at me all the while.

I've been the sole care giver of those turtles for over two years. I must admit this was one of the most hilarious and frightening experiences I've ever had with them. I hope that little taste of freedom doesn't give them any ideas. I would not like to see "The Great Escape: Turtle Edition." Though I'm sure I can just sell the rights to Fox.